Still Digesting Gaokao Nightmares

I don’t know whether people should be nervous now that the Gaokao is coming, but I still have Gaokao nightmares from time to time. 😱 There are mainly two kinds. The first one is the most hellish: I dream that I chose to repeat the year back then. At the time, I could have gone for free to another key high school’s shell program to repeat the year 🙈. Because of a whole series of factors, plus the so-called experience of my brother, I had seriously considered it. But later I heard those schools all ran on the Hengshui model, so I gave up. Long story. In the dream, I go there and get tortured, and in the end my repeat-year score is not even as high as the previous one. Every time, I wake up scared 💔💔. After waking up, I immediately look around, see that I really did get into university and am still in university 💔💔, and think: thank goodness 😱😱. It sounds funny when described like this, but the dream is genuinely hellish, as if it has triggered the deepest fear inside me 🎏🎏.

The second kind is the classic exam-room nightmare. Back then, during the English essay, I was so nervous that I failed to spell Canada correctly. I have remembered it ever since, and every now and then it gets moved into a nightmare to scare me. Geography does the same thing too. I’m so done. Anyway, I dream about all kinds of exam stuff and I can’t stand it. Maybe just one year after the Gaokao is still too soon to fully digest something like this. I wonder in which year of university this phenomenon finally disappears. 🫠🫠